Intimate partner violence is defined as “the behavior within an intimate relationship that causes physical, sexual, or psychological harm, including acts of physical aggression, sexual coercion, psychological abuse and controlling behaviors.” (World Health Organization, n.d.).
I think we are familiar with it due to all the news and social media content that includes intimate partner violence. Especially, in our country, there is not a day that we do not see news about how a woman was killed by her husband or boyfriend. There are also several studies examining intimate partner violence in heterosexual relationships in literature. However, in this blog, I am going to explain intimate partner violence in LGBTQ+ relationships. I do not think that it is that common to see news about an LGBTQ+ individual getting harmed by the partner. However, there is still some research, thanks to our professors.
Today, I am going to explain the findings of the article “Unheard Voices of LGB People in Türkiye on LGB-specific Experiences of Intimate Partner Violence: A Qualitative Analysis”. This article, which I loved so much, explored the experiences of 26 LGB participants in terms of intimate partner violence in Türkiye.
They categorized IPV forms under four themes. In this blog, I will briefly explain two of them to make the concept easier to understand.
- Invalidation of Sexuality
This is not a common experience in heterosexual relationships. Here, participants explained that their partners might deny or disregard their feelings and thoughts related to their sexual orientation, sexual experiences, and gender expression. For example, even though one is defining herself as lesbian, other partner constantly asks if she is sure or if there is any possibility that she might be straight. Another participant stated that she was always trying to prove that she was lesbian to her partner, and it was like a humiliation. This way of questioning one’s identity or sexual orientation by the partner and forcing them to prove it is a form of intimate partner violence since these people felt vulnerable, insecure, and self-doubtful.
- Controlling Sexuality and Sexual Behaviors
This theme includes mostly the pressure of the partner in sexual activity. They found three subthemes depending on the experiences of the participants, which are the role of active and passive, penetrative sex, and pressure to be liberal. In the first one, some stereotypes have a significant influence. The concept of having active and passive roles might give other meanings to some people. So basically, the top (penetrator) is more powerful and masculine, and the bottom (receiver) is less powerful. Even though this is a consensual sexual play normally, in some situations it might result in sexual violence. For example, one participant, who is passive sexually, stated that his partner (the top) treated him as submissive, passive, and feminine as a man, so he felt pressured and coerced into engaging in sexual activity, resulting in sexual assault. The fact that the partner carried this sexual role to real life and was treated like his partner is weak and feminine, even though he is not, is the real assault and humiliation for the passive partner. In the second subtheme, the penetrative sex, participants explained that people see penetrative sex as real sex and force them to perform it even though they do not want to. I want to give another example by quoting one participant’s statement about his experience that his partner violated his boundaries from the article:
“You know, ‘it’s going to happen anyway, and you have to keep going.’ As if it was an
obligation, as if it was a responsibility, and I had to fulfill it. There were times when it hurt
[and] I didn’t want it to continue, but I couldn’t say anything.”The last subtheme is about how sexual liberation is experienced in LGB relationships. Participants explained that there is pressure to be open to everything:
“Be open to all kinds of toys. There is something that we should be open to in all sexual games, like role play, and so on. For us, sex is very okay, the pressure of we are very free”
Consequently, LGB individuals might feel the pressure of it and must be involved in some sexual activities demanded by their partners even though they are not comfortable, which is a type of intimate partner violence.
In summary, I explained the first two themes of the article, which are invalidation of sexual identity and controlling sexuality and sexual behaviors. If you are interested, I recommend reading the article, which has more examples and explanations about the topic. In my next blog, I will explain the last two themes. I hope you will like it 😊.
References
Ummak, E., Toplu Demirtaş, E., & Özkan, H. (2024). Unheard voices of LGB people in Türkiye on LGB-specific experiences of intimate partner violence: A qualitative analysis. Violence Against Women, 31(8), 1727–1752. https://doi.org/10.1177/10778012241247195
