From Mind-fullness to Mindfulness: A Psychology Graduate’s Experiences
There are so many definitions of mindfulness available in various sources. Hence, I won’t give long and detailed information, but rather I’ll give you what I understand about the concept in a concise way. Mindfulness is “being aware”. Yes, basically, it is being aware and you can add anything after the phrase “being aware of…”. For instance, the moment, the breath, the joy, the life, who we are… It will portray your experiences. And today, I will talk about my experiences of mindfulness as a psychology graduate.
The scrappy journey started when I visited a neurologist for my physical pain. I didn’t know that she was interested in psychotherapy, and relatedly, she began to investigate my life and who I was with this mindset. Then, she realized I was a psychology student at that time and asked “Oh, have you tried mindfulness? Because it seems like the problems you have are quite related with psychological distress”. Until that day, and even until a very recent time, the mindfulness mentality looked “too gentle” to me based on how it’s portrayed in the environment, and I didn’t look favorably on it. However, after learning more about the concepts and their contents, having the chance to observe and practice both from my internship and my psychologist, I realized this was what I needed. For a better understanding of this need, I must mention my problems: inability to focus, derealization, attention deficit, self-criticizing, always being in a rush, and more.
As I said before, mindfulness is being aware, and due to these problems, I wasn’t aware of myself, my environment, events, feelings, my real thoughts, and who I was. Everything seems so automatic and as a threat, when you have these. With regular practice, my ability to focus improved and I became aware of what’s happening around and inside me, and their impacts on me, like feelings. For years, the future and the past have been occupying my mind throughout the day and even the night, no matter what I’m doing at the moment. After mindfulness practices, the little joys appeared more clearly and real, the focal point shifted toward “now” in the timeline and even some days it stayed there for many hours. That was so delicate for me. My body also had its share. Derealization and living with a foggy mind affects the relationship between me and my body. Awareness of the body practice provided an improvement for this relationship; sometimes I can feel that my body is “mine” and we are a whole together. As a product of this awareness and the ability to move my focus on different parts of the body, I realized that my pain had eased during the practices. Even the early signals of migraine could stop and that left me speechless. Approaching the pain gently, not complaining and not being in a rush to get rid of it really affected the way pain treated me! Although I use humorous language, this is the best way to convey this experience.
As a more concrete example, I can mention my relationship with food and how I eat. Before mindfulness, I was eating so fast, without proper chewing and being aware. That was causing me to add too much spice and search for sharper tastes. With mindful eating practices, I became aware of the aromas and extracts of the food, led me to decrease my spice consumption, especially eating salty and spicy. Also, it gave me gratitude and feeling of fullness, so I feel happier and healthier.
Now I want to give some warnings. Mindfulness, like everything else, should be practiced with an expert. Deciding what is more urgent, where to start, and what the process needs right now are important and it can be more beneficial for you. However, since my economic conditions were not right, I started from an application. Besides, sometimes I realized that I couldn’t focus on the moment but instead on the experiences throughout the practice. In other words, I wasn’t aware of the moment but was aware of how I was doing in the mindfulness exercise. It can be a challenge, if you are a psychology student or graduate who continuously checks on yourself. Lastly, be aware of the conditions you live in. Maybe the family, friends, or work/school environment don’t let you be aware, and as a defense mechanism, they may shut the system down. Being automatic and unaware is helpful for us to live in this world and attacking and hating it are not the aim of mindfulness. Hence, please try to prioritize the self-compassion more than anything throughout the process. If you intend to build self-compassion for doing mindfulness, it will give you more, remember this.
References
DeBenedette, V. (2021, November 15). How to cope with Post-COVID brain fog. Verywell Health. https://www.verywellhealth.com/dealing-with-covid-brain-fog-5209460
SDOAKADEMİ. (2016, June 13). Çocuklarla yapılabilecek farkındalık (Mindfulness) çalışmaları. Retrieved October 2, 2024, from https://www.sdoakademi.com/cocuklarla-yapilabilecek-farkindalik-mindfulness-calismalari/
